Sarah Silverman an expert at racism, sexism, religion and social media was appointed as President Elect Trump’s Press Secretary, then almost immediately dropped after her first official tweet.
Silverman released 1 official tweet and then was pulled from her position under Trump. There is no official word on what happened but speculation is rampant.
“Silverman’s appointment was a big mistake” says one Trump insider “We had evaluated every CEO trump knew and they all came up short. Not one had a secretary or intern who could fit a Presidential Press release into a 140 character tweet.” They were stumped.
No one suspected she actually was one of them she hides it well
“Then Donald told us to hire “Silverman”.” It wasn’t until after we hired Sarah that Ivanka explained he meant his retired golfing buddy @Silver_man1944.”
Fox News Reported that the issue was about religion. “They knew she was Jewish but they thought it meant she was like a Jew – you know Jew-ish. No one suspected she actually was one of them. She never seems to be obsessed with money, she really hides it well.” They said.
The Fox pundits agreed “It was clear she had to go – The cabinet is perfectly balanced with rich, older, businessmen. Adding a woman from a foreign religious group would have annoyed them.”
Unlike Trump, Millennials have a thing for older women
CNN reports that Trump hired Silverman because of her support during the election. He loved her speech at the DNC telling Democrats they were being ridiculous.
Silverman Leading an “Aunty Trump” Rally
Leading the whole “Aunty Trump” movement was another Trump like. Unlike Trump, Millennials have a thing for older women. If their mother’s hot, cool, hip, sister tells them to change their vote they will.
The hugest reason for the appointment though, was when Silverman compared Trump to Hitler. Trump has stated privately that his political style is based on Hitler, and if they ever met they would have a huge Bromance. He has was touched that she saw how close Trump and Hitler really are.
Sources close to Trump say he could not live with the tweet stating: “tweeting at night is terrifically unprofessional and should never ever be done.
Also like my wife said in her amazingly original speech “Our culture has gotten too mean and too rough” It‘s just not acceptable to call someone big, fat and smelly even if they are a cunt.“ So I called Sarah and explained that: effective immediately she will be asked to step down from her position as Press Secretary on my governing team and will no longer be working for us.
Those close to Silverman say she never aware of Trumps proposition. The timing coincided with her launching new social media platform – StarTwit.
Similar to the Uber and AirBNB concepts, stars with humongous twitter followings can rent their account to normal people. Rent by the day, hour, even by the tweet and experience feeling that you are the center of the universe. Silverman said she came up with the idea stating “If Twitter isn’t bothering to make money on tweets then I might as well.”
Could StarTwit kick off a social media rental boom?
Celebrities, Professional Athletes and politicians are hugely excited about StarTwit. Many have had issues where their twitter accounts were “hacked” and controversial tweets were released. Now they have an excuse and don’t have to keep changing their password.
Silverman’s press agent would not speak on the record about the details. They just commented “We all know that Sarah is constantly doing things that are funny but she would never do something this funny.”
Silverman herself is not available to comment on the kerfuffle as she is currently on a private script writing retreat. She is working on a script with the working title:
Orange Anus or Big Fat Smelly Cunt – Inside story of the President of the Hole World….