Tag Archives: Trump

New Donald Trump turnip toy a hit in Russia, Eastern Europe

Donald Turnip Head a Mr Potato head knockoff based on Donald Trump is the hottest toy in Eastern Europe.

Someone in Eastern Europe took some anti Trump sentiment and channeled it into a toy. Now it is one of the fastest selling things in Russia, Poland, Belarus, and the Ukraine.

Like the original Mr Potato Head, you need to supply the vegetable that will be Mr Trump. Some have been using a large orange pumpkin for a more realistic Trump look

People in countries that are unhappy with President Trump’s behavior are after retailers to buy stock the store as they don’t trust Russian online shopping web sites.  So far stores in   Germany, Australia claim to have orders placed and even Nordstum in the US  is looking for it to replace their top selling Rock In A Bag.

Russian President Putin – a close friend of Donald Trump – has been bringing the toy everywhere and is always joking as if it is the real Trump.

Rumours are that the original doll was to be a talking Trump doll, but translators could not make sense of President Trump’s speech and grammar.

Sales have been the best of any non Christmas toy

They decided to go ahead with selling the pieces that could be used on a real turnip. They planned on launching the full body talking Turnip once they figured out what the hell Trump was saying, but sales have been the best of any non Christmas toy,  so good they may not need to do it.

Boys will love playing with the soon to be launched Kellyanne Conway Corn Cob Doll.



As we post this Nordstrum announced they would drop Ivanka Trump’s line of clothing and jewelry. This will really upset President Trump knowing they will stoop to sell a rock in a bag but dump his daughter’s designs. Read More: Nordstrum drops Trump line



Donald Trump upset “President Bannon” could cost him the Nobel prize

 Obama got the Nobel prize and Trump wants it too. The problem is President Bannon is mucking up his chances.

Donald Trump is competitive and wants to prove everyone wrong. Winning the election wasn’t enough, he wants to outdo or undo everything Barack Obama has done before him.   He wants to beat him on every comparison including the Nobel Prize.Trump thinks Obama had accomplished nothing when he was given the Peace Prize.

This is one of the reasons he is trying to immediately fulfill every election promise he made.

Like many politicians and media Trump planned on cashing in on Muslims to get what he wants… But President Bannon’s plans aren’t working for him.

Trump believes closing the borders and restricting travel will keep the Muslim terrorists at home and cause peace. Compared to what Obama did it would make him a shoe-in for the Nobel.

Now things are caught up in the legal and bureaucratic red tape Trump usually ignores

Problem is the travel restrictions are not going as planned. A”So-called” judge suspending the executive order and opened up the border. Now things are caught up in the legal and bureaucratic red tape he usually ignores.

Trump would like to blame or fire someone for messing this up. His problem is that everyone knows his advisor Steve Bannon came up with the plan. At the same time there is a #PresidentBannon movement online that is embarrassing to Trump. If he blames Bannon for the mess he admits to the President Bannon issue.

If the Peace prize is gone he will try for another one like literature…Dylan got one for music – maybe he could get one for his Tweets and speeches

So Donald Trump is stuck and in a mess he has no idea how to get out of. He’s also not sure if Steve Bannon is messing things up on purpose as well as promoting the #presidentbannon movement. It looks like another issue  his kids will have to work out for him.

Read More

Trump takes a “hands-on” approach with White House interns

President Trump already planning legacy statue to dominate Washington skyline

China, Mexico turn the tables on Trump’s border wall idea



Iran Responds To Trump Immigration Policy Positively, with A Twist

 Even President Trump had to be Surprised when Iran’s leader proposed a business deal

Iran’s positive response to US immigrant restrictions was expected – they don’t want to let anyone go to the United States. The surprise is that they want to partner up with President Trump in a business deal.

Iran’s leaders have not problem with Immigration Restrictions

President Trump’s positive statements about Waterboarding have caught the attention of people worldwide, mostly in horror, but some as an opportunity.

Trump is the first President they trust to do their Waterboarding properly

Iran’s leaders have indicated that they would like to work with the United States in interrogating prisoners. Like many big businesses have done, Iran and other countries are trying to reduce costs by outsourcing. America has developed an expertise in centralizing their Waterboarding activities in Guantanamo Bay. They seem like they could increase the scope of their Waterboarding without a loss in quality.

The Sudan, Syria, Libya, Somalia, and Yemen, have also indicated they would like to be included in a deal with the US.

Waterboarding –  though often confused by Google as Wake Boarding – it’s not the same

Their spokesmen have said

“Trump is the first President they trust to do their Waterboarding properly.” “His business background gives them the confidence that the operation will be cost effective and efficient” 

President Trump is expected to relocate the facilities from Guantanamo Bay to mainland USA. The inside story is that it will be to the state of Mississippi – as in 1 Mississippi, 2 Mississippi…



Will Trudeau, Pena Nieto, Obama, Thump Trump Over NAFTA?

Justine Trudeau is re-forming the Three Amigos to take on bully Trump over NAFTA.

Mexican President Enrique Pena Nieto and Barack Obama have agreed to join Trudeau to triple team Trump in the Boardroom and take him down.


Trudeau, Pena Neito, and Obama can’t wait to get at Trump

President Trump is looking to simply dictate the new terms of the agreement, forcing Mexico and Canada to comply.

The Three Amigos get along like brothers and will triple team Trump with many boardroom tactics. Trump is a tough boardroom negotiator but has weaknesses they can exploit:

 “He is an idiot with numbers for one. He hasn’t figured out that bigly is not a number – it’s barely a word. We will be talking in Pesos, $US, CDN$, and Metric until his head spins.”

“He Doesn’t know the details of NAFTA now so we could negotiate a worse deal for America and he would say he won!”

Trump – unprepared and easily distracted will quickly loose interest in negotiating and try to close the deal.

“If he starts getting some traction we will switch to a mix of Spanish and French. Trump will lose him mind”

 Mr Wonderful, Kevin O’Leary was first choice as a boardroom Pit Bull until he joined the Conservative Leadership Race.


If Trump thinks to bring in advisors who could get the upper hand in the deal, then Trudeau is prepared.

“Trump loves campaigning so we will trick him into doing a referendum on the deal like the Brexit vote. His Ego won’t be able to say no!”



Insiders say Trudeau has growing confidence after Trump agreed to the Keystone pipeline deal. If he is that desperate to create jobs Trudeau will have an upper hand. He just finds the idea of being alone with Trump as creepy.

Similar Stories:

China, Mexico turn the tables on Trump’s border wall idea

Trump to Offer Green Cards to Canadians and Brits

Trump Policy Forces NHL Canadian Players out of U.S -Will Leafs Lose Matthews?




Trump Sex Tapes – Russia Says They Are Destroyed

 Whether or not you believed the BuzzFeed reports about the Trump Sex Tapes the Russians have, it is irrelevant now.

Russia says  they no longer have any Sex Tapes of Donald Trump made while he was in Moscow. They claim to have deleted and destroyed all of the evidence. They did not give a reason for this but there is a lot of speculation.

Sex Tapes are Incredibly Huge in Russia

Many  on team Trump say it proves that the Russians never had the sex tapes, it was all an incredible lie.

 Many others follow Rosie O’Donnell’s viewpoint

Washington insiders say it is a peace offering – Trump the businessman could be blackmailed – they want a good relationship with Trump the President.

Many others follow Rosie O’Donnell’s viewpoint – that Donald Trump Sex tapes are too gross to even imagine, let alone watch. Russian media states that Russian intelligence agents are still speechless on the subject.

Trump Policy Forces NHL Canadian Players out of U.S -Will Leafs Lose Matthews?

President Trump’s America First policy will hit the NHL harder than other sports leagues.

With the majority of NHL teams located in the US but only 15% of it’s players American, it will be a disaster. There will have to be a major swap of players. Fans won’t know their teams anymore.

It’s Great to have Crosby in Canada but will the Leafs Lose Matthews?

President Trump’s policies are true to his campaign promises to create American jobs, but he does it like a showman. “Trump’s forte is promotion, he knows that job creation takes a while to have impact so he is looking at hitting industries with high visibility.” Say spokes insiders.

Trump tweets showed what was coming for the NHL


Imagine what Leafs Nation will do if  Auston Matthews goes back to Arizona?”

With all Canadian and other foreign Players leaving the US there will be a huge void of professional players.

 American players only take up 15% of the NHL

American’s will want (or may be forced by Trump) to go back to play in the US.

 “Auston Matthews is the best thing to happen to the Toronto Maple Leafs in decades. Imagine what the fans and Leafs Nation will do if he goes back to Arizona?”

This means most American Minor League professionals, College players, and Junior National team players will be called up.

It’s not clear if Canadians will still be allowed to take US Hockey scholarships.

Many Canadian Players will have the opportunity to get US citizenship and green cards. Read More> However this will prevent them from representing Canada at the Olympics.

NHL Commissioner has not yet commented on the situation or how it impacts his league expansion plans.


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Trump’s America 1st Policy Hits 2017 Oscars. Takes Revenge On Streep

Trump MAGA Policy Shocks Academy – Oscar Nominations a Mess

Bettman’s Plan to Sell NHL to the World

Player nationalities on the Penguins and Leafs – could they do a straight swap?





Donald Trump’s Big Inauguration Surprise

The Secret Service scrambles as President Elect Trump demands all female Secret Service bodyguard for the inauguration.


As guests and entertainers continue to bail on the Presidential Inauguration, P.E.Trump has decided to take things into his own hands. He is going to surprise everyone with an all female secret service bodyguard.

Everywhere I go people will see beautiful American women, it will be like the Miss America pageant every day.

Trump team insiders explained “He sees this as symbolic, giving American men something to aspire to and showing women they can equally work for powerful men. Also when he has these women in private it will hugely prove the women who said he tried to assault them are big liars.”

This last minute demand  has left the secret service scrambling to select and train agents.

Potential agents are training 24/7 with a focus on self defense

It is a challenge because Trump’s direction for choosing his personal agents focused on the “body” part of Bodyguard.  “Everywhere I go people will see beautiful American women, it will be like the Miss America pageant every day.”

Trump also wants them to dress more fashionable, “Everyone knows the president has bodyguards why hide them in plain suits?”

Trumps criteria for the agents prioritizes the “Body” not the “Guard”

The inside joke is that they will change the agency’s name to “Victoria’s Secret Service.”   “The agents we choose look great in training but who knows what Trump will think of them? We are trying to delay until the agents are prepared but the President Elect wants to make a big impact at the inauguration.”

Female agents aren’t new to the Secret Service but Trump’s criteria on looks is.